BCD, a cheeky comedy rap video

The Silent World

I'm sitting here today listening to Radio 2, listening to a programme about Council Cuts and the possibility of Library closures and the thought occurred to me - would anybody notice if their local  library closed down? After all, people can buy second hand books for as little as 50p from their local charity shops so  why bother taking out and returning books when they can be bought and kept?

Now, I'm an avid library user - I love spending an hour browsing through the shelves, marvelling at the titles and the author names plus  reading the introductions to the stories themselves. I love the fact that I can choose lots of books to take home and all for free. However, something has changed within the library sector of late and that is the horrible rise of the self-service. I can now go in to the library, return my books, take out more books and borrow DVDs without saying anything to a living person. 

What has happened to the lovely librarian who used to stamp the books and have a quick chat about the author and advising me  on other books that the author has written? They have been replaced by a machine. Apparently this is progress. 

At Supermarkets now, the self service check out has become the norm. Yes, there is usually a person somewhere in the vicinity of the checkouts to lend a helping hand but lets face it, it takes a brave person to man these with the amount of frustration that happens at these check outs. I suspect that is why it is normally a woman who is supervising them. Staff seem to get very frustrated when I decide I'd rather queue up and have someone else put my shopping through the checkout and talk to someone rather than risk the awfulness that can only be attributed to these decidedly deadly checkouts with the monotonous electronic voice.

Are we becoming an unsociable nation? Are we losing the interaction skills of ages past? Certainly manners are being lost with more and more people grunting their thanks or expecting people to respond to their requests without the word 'Please.' 

How about the electronic gaming devices where people can talk to people all over the world as they play against them? Some people are room bound for days and nights just so they can concentrate on their game play. 

This year, more people than ever will give their small children an ipad or a lap top. I wonder if it is because parents have lost the ability to play with their children, to give them time. Last night I watched a programme about people on benefits at Christmas. Their main priority was not to pay the rent or to explore ways of providing healthy meals but to give their children more stuff that they had no room for in the first place, presumably so that these children  could be kept quiet and out of the parents way.

It's very sad that we have become a nation of people that no longer want to interact in person with each other. The beginning of a silent world is starting and I for one, would rather live in a world where I can speak to people, have a laugh with people, listen to people rather than experience the dark cloud of non interactional  silence.

Perhaps with sharing my thoughts with you, we could start to begin to end the oppression of the silence and explode through the very walls of our own personal boxes of self imposed aloneness because in the words of a very well known advert, "We are worth it". 

Loneliness

Since joining  a group of singers, all of which eat music  for breakfast I was finding myself having immense  difficulty learning not only the melody but  the words of the choral sheet music required because not only do I not read music but I don't read Latin either...

One of the singers asked if I would like to meet up and go through the words so that I would know not only the pronunciation of the words but also their meaning. Although I had previously said Yes, I didn't really want to do it as it required some sort of effort on my behalf. Not only would I have to  get the car out, set the Sat Nav, find this persons house but I was in for a lesson of sorts and lessons of any kind can quickly turn me back in to a teenager finding excuses to bunk off whatever class I was supposed to be in. On the plus side, this woman, Beth seemed really nice and did only live a five minutes drive away. It was something I was dreading. I didn't want to do it because I didn't want to commit to it. I wanted to stay at home and work on the computer with the occasional pat on the head for the dog for company. Finally, the time came and I could put it off no longer so I grabbed my keys and headed out to find Beth's house. Actually, I found it very quickly because it turned out to be even closer than I thought! I knocked at the door, took a deep breath and when the door opened ventured inside. Beth had a bandage round her knee holding an ice pack and it turned out she had fallen whilst out shopping that morning rather badly and was finding it difficult to put too much weight on it. Well, that made me feel guilty - not only was she feeling poorly but Beth was still happy to help me out with the dreaded sheet music. We sat down on the sofa, got the music out and began going through each word and each piece of music with Beth first saying the word  and me repeating it. Next I had to decipher a piece by myself. I felt such a twit trying to work it all out and kept stumbling over the words but with Beth's encouragement soon began to almost enjoy working everything out feeling very pleased with myself when I managed to accomplish whole sentences in Latin. 

Finally it was over and I thanked Beth and stood to leave.

"Would you like a cup of tea?"

I almost declined but somehow I felt my mouth saying "Yes I would love some tea." What was I doing? I had already been there for over an hour and I certainly didn't want to do any more on the music. Sometimes I find that my brain becomes overloaded with too much information and acts like a wheelbarrow - it simply tips it out to make room for something else. I really wanted to hang on to the information because it was essential to me carrying on with the singers. I followed Beth into the kitchen and watched as she made a pot of tea for two. I smiled as Beth put the timer on the oven on for a few minutes so the tea would be perfect. That was a bit like her I thought, with everything having to be done the right way. Beth has never struck me as an emotional person but then,

"I am so pleased you came round today. If you hadn't I would have just sat here feeling a bit down and very fed up with just me to talk to. You've cheered me up no end."

You see, in my selfishness, I hadn't thought as to what effect it would have on Beth to not turn up.  In fact, to be honest, I had given her no thought at all. Beth is not an elderly,person and  not a typically lonely person as she works four days a week and here she was thanking me for keeping her company.

I have to say that this was a bit of an ice breaker in a way because we then sat down and chatted about anything that came to mind for a further hour and I enjoyed every bit of her company as Beth could be quite entertaining with stories of her grown up children.

So, next time you want to  cancel on someone, have a think about the other person and how they have put aside their time to see you and what possible effect it could have on them. I didn't know Beth was fed up and when I left she was thinking about joining me for my first venture  into a Samba band. I met  a good friend today and I am so pleased that I made the right choice in the end.

Luke Sital-Singh - Greatest Lovers

Colours Miyagi - Faster Life [Music Video] I play the mum :)

The Audition Trilogy Part 3

I was asked to go to an audition to play a homeless person (please see previous blog for prep for that audition). I arrived at reception, having been sat in a park at the Elephant & Castle for the previous hour, and waited for the receptionist to notice me. He was deep in conversation with another colleague so I waited....and I waited... and I waited. Eventually, I managed to catch his eye as he looked at me in a rather disapproving manner.

"I'm here for  the audition for the Homeless person. I should be on your electronic register."

Having seemingly assured himself that I wasn't in fact, going to be asking for money, or to use their toilet facilities he relaxed and began chatting away about how he was supposed to be on the One Show that night but he had been up-surged by a bunch of tomatoes so had been invited to sit in the audience instead. 

"Of course I told them where to get off but I'm still going though" he said as he flounced off. I stood and waited for his return.

Once back, he checked the electronic register and after quite a while finally found my name. This was probably no mean feat as the  building was huge and no doubt held an army of names for each department with appointments.  Finally, I was checked in and told to take a seat. After a while, a man joined  me with two children aged 5 and 2 (almost 3). They were also waiting to audition although it was only the five year old that would be taking part. Juan, the Casting Director came along and took us up to what can only be described as an abandoned room. There were a few tables in the middle and a few chairs and that was about it. There was no water to be had anywhere and I had forgotten my bottle of water at home and was now needing some rather desperately. We all sat down and introduced ourselves and Juan asked if we would mind playing a game to see the interaction between the child and myself. The idea was that I would hold a box of chocolates and she had to try everything in her power to get them off  me.  That was the first hurdle - this must have been the only child in the world that didn't like  chocolate so she clearly wasn't really bothered as to whether she won them or not. Her dad suggested that we use a bottle of Fruit Shoot (believe you me, I was nearly drooling over it by this stage). I had to hold the bottle and the little girl had to  try to take it whether in  a physical way or by using dialogue. She was very shy so it was difficult to get any reaction at all. Meanwhile the two year old was having a lovely time and practising all her dance stretches on the chair. I decided to run around the room and see if that would help. Clearly the five year old enjoyed this and much laughter was had by all at her trying to grab the bottle from me. We sat back down and Juan asked for availability dates but you could see that he was doubting whether the little girl would be suitable due to her  shyness. He took them back to reception whilst I waited inside the desolate room with nothing to look at but the blank walls. Juan then reappeared  with a young lad called Ruben who was to play either a cleaner or a mime artist. 

Our first exercise: "Felicity take a part of the room and protect it. Ruben will try to move you because you are in his way and he needs you to leave."

I threw my old raincoat on to the floor, sat down, grabbed my bag and began to beg to invisible passerbys. Bless him, Ruben really went for it trying to move me, even by grabbing me to get me to move but this lady wasn't for moving! 

The next exercise was where Ruben had to berate me and then try to create some pity as his boss would soon be firing him if I didn't move. Again, all efforts were thwarted. Another scenario was created with Juan now sitting on the floor begging and I was to get upset as the passerbys were giving him all of the money so I had to get him to move without  leaving my spot. By this time, I was a totally unreasonable homeless person who depended on this money to live on so I managed to create a negative atmosphere so that he was the one that felt bad and had to move on. 

Afterwards he said that he would do the same again but this time he would go further along the pavement (Pavement? You can see how we were getting in to this) and pick up his young son who was also begging. I had to look slightly guilty but  not for long as I was up and in his place. After all, didn't he get more money in that spot?!

Next, Juan laid on the floor, faking death and I had to pretend that this was my closest friend who had now died so lots of  tears and sobbing whilst being comforted by Ruben. 

Juan seemed very pleased and again checked availability for October. Will I get the part? Who knows what goes on sometimes in the Casting Directors mind. Still, it was fun and a great experience which will stay with me for quite some time to come I suspect.
Next Please!

Part 2 of The Audition Trilogy.

Audition Two
So, having completed the previous audition (see other blog) it was on to the next one but before that I had a bit of time to spare so I headed off to Oxford Street to BHS - they do a mean prawn sandwich there - plus I needed to do something about my appearance so that I didn't look like the Hairdresser from the earlier audition.  Once I had eaten I headed for the ladies and proceeded to change my look. I shook my hair down from its 'up do' combed it through, paled the make up and took off my jewellery and replaced it with new options. The cleaner in the toilets had clearly never seen anybody do this before and spent the entire  time watching me without saying a word. When in this situation it is often a good thing to appear very confident, as if you would do this on a normal day, every day. Maybe she was a little worried in case I was to strip off but I didn't have a change of clothes with me so no doubt she was quite relived when she realised that I had finished and wasn't going to change. 

I made my way to Bond Street Tube to catch the train to Green Park. The Jubilee line wasn't working...Back to Oxford Circus to catch the train for Earls Court.

I had with me my trusty map showing me the pedestrian route from the station to my destination or so I thought. Having read the 'South East" direction I proceeded to walk in that direction. After ten minutes I was greatly relieved to find one of those street maps, you know the kind, they are usually found in town on various corners with a very helpful 'You are here' arrow. Having looked at the map I realised that I was nowhere near where I needed to be and in fact, should have proceeded Eastwards. I retraced my steps down the very long road back to the station and started again. I had plenty of time and so I wasn't worried at all but by now my feet were beginning to hurt. Eventually, I found the road I needed to be in. A select number of shops occupied the road and as I walked along I began to doubt the validity of the Google Map. However, in the distance I spied a restaurant with outside tables covered in white lined cloths. Could this be the place? Indeed it was and I walked on with renewed vigour to find the nearest coffee place. This time I had not been given anything to learn and hadn't even seen a script so although part of me was a little anxious at the prospect of going to an audition with no clues as to what the script was about, I began to relax as at least I didn't have to worry about learning any lines to gain the part. My audition time was 4.45pm and feeling refreshed after a sit down,   I set  off to the restaurant. It felt very odd going into a restaurant ( especially as this was more than posh) and a kindly waiter showed me to three people sitting outside who were, in his words "something to do with it."

There was a woman with various papers who was ticking people off a list so I introduced myself to her. A man sat across from her who was auditioning to play the husband and a young girl who would be the daughter. I was given several sheets of paper to look at explaining who  the group were that were financing the film . The second sheet was almost a disclaimer but nothing needed signing. Then came the third sheet "And these are your lines. Learn them before you go in." The man sitting next to me said that he had had the script sent to him and therefore didn't need to see any of the papers. The young girl had also had the script. All I'd  had was a text message about the audition! My face must have shown some kind of horror because the man said "Whats the matter - don't you do dialogue then?" Restraining myself from strangling him I explained that this was the first time I had seen the script.
"Well, it's only a few lines - should be easy." He said.
Well yes, usually if you haven't had the day from Hell that I had been through (see previous blog). Now I carry with me a large diary in which I keep records of outstanding payments, pending jobs etc and it is also useful when in need of a spare page. I turned to January which had been very quiet for work and began to write down the part of the script I needed to learn. I find this helps because when learning something in a short space of time, it enables you to circle the most relevant words so even if the script is not exactly said as printed on the page, the person taking the audition knows you have got the measure of it. Fortunately for me Lady Luck must have decided to give me a break and two girls walked up to be signed in. They didn't know each other but both of them were in a hurry as they had to go to work. I volunteered to let them go ahead of me as I didn't need to rush anywhere. This meant that not only did the person doing the signing in think that I was wonderful but gave me extra time to look at the words :)
Finally, I was called in to the restaurant and taken downstairs. This was in total contrast to the other audition. It was a beautiful room, very dimly lit with the table setting laid out for a dozen people. Candles burned away  giving the room a very romantic atmosphere. However, now I couldn't even see the script even if I wanted too, in fact, I could barely make out the two  people who were to audition me! I sat down and we did the necessary pleasantries before talking about the script.

All of a sudden in came one of the waiters  with the news that we would have to move because the party that had booked the room for later had already started to arrive. We were shown into  a brighter room but equally as luxurious:

However, this room had piped music which gradually got louder. I had to refrain from laughing as the situation was getting a little ridiculous with us now having to speak rather loudly. I quickly explained that I had not received the script so I was a little in the dark as to  the character they wanted me to  play. All was quickly explained - it was the role of Mum who was a bit gossipy and who had a daughter who was the love of her life. I laid my diary out before me (well, they had no idea what was in it did they?) and somehow managed to remember all the lines. I actually surprised myself and when asked to repeat the lines manage to do it again. I think this was mainly due to the acting classes I had been going to (still go to ) where scripts are learnt pretty quickly. Anyway, having thanked them for seeing me I wandered off home (no more travel disasters thankfully).
The next day I received a text asking me to take the part and I accepted. Life can be strange at  times but  certainly never boring!